Snow sucks... No, Really it Does...




There are not many things that I hate... I can tolerate most people, situations, places, foods, you name, I can take it... But, there is one thing that I hate more than than death itself...Snow! I can't describe to you the dread I feel when I see those little dots falling from the sky and freezing everyting in it's path. Actually, I hate the cold in general; snow is the rotten cherry on top. If anyone were to ask any friend (even foe) of mine three major facts about me, my dread for the snow would be top of the list! I'm not one to complain (at least not much) but I don't understand how people can live, even play in the snow. Having to put on a snow suit, or finally getting warm enough and somehow a bit of snow will find its way down the back of your neck where it melts and turns soggy...eck! When I was I child, we used to live in Iowa... it was as if the state had some sort of contract with the sky! It would be so bitterly cold and windy because the land is so flat there. It would snow foot upon foot upon foot of snow. The trucks would push the stuff to each side of the road and would cause these huge mountains of dirty ice that you couldn't see over. Dreadful stuff...
My birthday is on the 19th of December. When I was a child I used to pray for God to somehow change my birthdate to the summertime (obviously a futile request. Hey, I was a kid...) Who wants to be outside trudging around in that crap. I vowed to myself that I would live in a place that was warm and would never snow... I fully intend on keeping this promise.

LoveHater... Hater of Love


I know me. There are things that I do that I know are simply ridiculous but I still do it. They say the first step of recovery is acceptance, I accept the fact that I can be a loon at times. I'll explain:
When I like someone, I experience three tiers of emotion: (1) Excitement... new guy, new conversations, it's exciting to meet someone new and see if they are cool enough to kick it with. I'll talk about him all the time to my friends and give them a blow by blow of every conversation. (2) Denial (of the crush): My old roommate calls this bi-polar intimacy (she's brilliant), reminiscent of the days when little boys would dip a girls pig tails in ink, this is the part where I totally deny the fact that I ever met this person. I am annoyed if anyone asks me about this person and I unfortunately treat the natural progression of this potential relationships as the flu. I feel myself changing as it begins to take over, though it's obvious to everyone around me, I'm irritated that I'm being that obvious and deny everything; I am distracted and stare off into space like a nut, and I'm mad at myself for allowing it to happen to me, rolling my eyes with a here-we-go-again attitude; I'm cranky and annoyed with my self...Crazy, right? People bask in the glory of crushes and things of that nature while I'm mad and thinking of what I could have done to prevent it. I am eventually worn down and I allow it do it's thing (3) Acceptance: I am once again speaking about this person and admit that I liked them before. It's now supercharged into an obsession and I'm once again running off at the head to my friends: Oh! So-and-so loves that song, too! Oh, So-and-so is allergic to that! Oh, So-and-so hated that movie! I know that my friends could care less about what he ate for breakfast or his mother's maiden name but I can't help but share.
I know this stems from my obsession with control, not over others, but more of myself. I hate the inevitability of things; my inability to change things that are going to happen anyway. Love is a wonderful thing, my beef is the fact I can't control all of it; my only comfort is knowing I can control my actions... you can't always control your feelings, but you can control your actions. Ahh, control is my cigarette, when I have it, I can sigh, relax, and know that everything is okay...