BabyFace...huh...?




BabyFace moved back to the East Coast about two weeks ago. A couple of days ago Babyface and I were texting on the phone and he asked me to send a picture of my face over the cell...no problem. Afterwards he's being very expressive (mushy) and saying things like "Oh, you look beautiful" so forth and so on... Of course there is nothing wrong with that but there was nothing fantastic about the blurry mess of a picture that I sent him. Big whoop. Anyway, he proceeds to send me the following texts verbatim..." I didnt tel u this b 4 but u had me starin at my phone walkin down 42nd..." he then texts..."4 real ma u sexy as hek i dont c how u dont c or admit 2 it" I'm thinking umm, that's nice. He then texts, "I remenis alot bout our meeting at klub kompound alot n even take a good stare at da 1st pik u sent n da 1st pik we took.Smile" mind you, these texts are coming back to back, "4 real ma i got krazy luv n respekt 4 u. Ever since day 1. It spooks me out 2 c u go da distance 4 me? ma i appresheate it all" This text confuses me a bit, I don't know what distance I went to but I responded with a thank you or something like that; he then sent, "Trust ma these piks u sent are krazy n yes da best iv seen in a long time u look not only fierless but sessyer then a magazine. I promise..." I didn't think it was all that great...no, I know it wasn't all that great and I don't know where these surge of complements are coming from; he then sends, "Kind skared of u ma. U taste look smell n feel good. Im just gonna say one day ma one day..." I text back a laugh (haha) and let him know that "that day" will more than likely never come...he then texts, "Yay! I luv da kurent [Blue] as she is!" and then..."I hope u kno im slightly in luv w u ma im lookin at ya piks 24/7" and then, he sends the clencher..."U got luv 4 me?"

Ummm...now I'm going to tell you (like I always do) exactally what was on my mind at this moment...I didn't understand the question first of all. He and I are friends and everything and we kicked it pretty hard, I will admit that and he is a great guy (obviously) but I didn't think that that comment warranted a response..."U got luv 4 me?"....so I pretend that I didn't hear the question and said something along the lines of: "Huh?! I didn't hear you, could you text a little louder?!" and other silly things like that...needless to say, he didn't find this amusing to say the least. He kurtly texted back: "nevermin"Damn! I did it again...I asked my cousin what I should of done and of course she looks at me like a one celled organism and responds..."Say you love him back?! Duh! 'Nuf said!" Yeah, but of course I couldn't be that blase' about it. That's my dogg and I didn't want to lead him in the wrong direction...I eventually text back "Come on, what do you think?!" implying that of course I have endless love for you darling...without really having to say it. He says "I don't like to assume" I hate it when people say that...without assumptions, we wouldn't get out of the bed every morning! So, I went overboard..." I have unrestrained, unbound, uncompromied, tangible, exploding love for you my love, my heart, my life... =) " or something like that. What was his response, you ask...you guessed it "nevermin"...sigh!! Well, I tried, I'm not saying it and he has to deal with it.
He eventually got over it and we are just as cool as ever but the whole thing made me think...Why can't I just...say it?! Was it because it's not what I feel or is it that I'm a punk? For some reason, I'm leaning towards the latter. I don't think I have the emotional fortitude to say I love you to anyone of the opposite sex outside of my family in a romantic sense...whew! Reflection without a mirror is exhausting...