My Dearest Friend...

She has been my friend for nearly eight years and could be either commended or condemned for remaining the same. We were so close in high school because we were so similar: stubborn, immovable, naive, and loud about it. Though we have similarities today, I feel that I have morphed and grown (at least I'm trying to) and she has remained the same. Thoughts and views of a 16 or 17 year old will not (should not) be the same as the thoughts of a 22 or 23 year old. My aunt told me when I went to college, that the summer after your freshman year is the hardest. You will return home and feel like everyone is treating you like a child and your friends will have either changed for the better or remained stagnant. She couldn't have been any more correct. My friend remained stubborn, and to me, very close minded. It's as if she is stuck and cannot move forward. It's so frustrating to want to share the things you have discovered with someone and instead of them taking it in and possibly applying it to their own lives, they discard it as if it were unimportant. Attending an HBCU was one of the best decisions I have made in my life. It has helped me to see how so much diversity can be found in one group of people. She too attended one but did not absorb it and allow it to fertilize her thought processes. I don't want to change her but I want her to learn. I am unfortunately beginning to outgrow her. I have sat in a quiet place and tried to decide whether I was being self righteous or condescending and I have come to the conclusion that I am not. In fact, I have tried to lessen my excitement about self discovery in order for her to feel okay with her decisions. I have spoken to many of our mutual friends and they can relate. It's sad to see someone walk into negative situations that are avoidable, over and over again despite the fact they have been forewarned. I have not decided what to do about the matter but something has to happen. I told her when I started my blog and sent her my address and our mutual friend's. I know she has not read it and as I type this blog I feel free to say what I please because she is totally uninterested in things like this: revealing oneself and putting your feelings into print; even if it is your friends. I'm not saying that she has to do the same, this isn't for everyone but I just hope she will sit in a quiet place, close her eyes and think over her past, present, and future life decisions and see if she is going about them in the most efficient way. I will have to wait and see...